A Question For the Ages...

Why is it that a kid doesn't know they are going to throw up until 1/10th of a second before it actually happens? I'm pretty sure that ever time I've been sick, I had more notice than enough time to say, "Mom, I think I'm..."
The above scenario would have been preferable to the one that awakened Craig and I on Wednesday morning at 1:15. I should clarify, the situation woke Craig up. Emily starting throwing up while she was sleeping, all over her father.
Finally, some justice in this harsh world! Although I was the one who carried her in my stomach for 9 months, gave agonizing birth to her 9lb 4oz self, got pooped on, spit up on, cleaned up messes seemingly straight out of The Shining and bandaged many an ouchie, usually I also get the short end of the vomit stick.
Do not fret, fellow mothers of the world. I had my time in the sun when Craig brought her downstairs for water and I got to deal with the sheets, the pajamas, the pillows and the foamie covering our mattress. Not a pretty sight...or smell, to be quite honest.
Remaking the bed at 1:30 in the morning was a mere trial run for the next episode at 4 and then again at 7 a.m.
After an entire day of the "dry heebes" she finally perked up last night. This joy however was short lived when Emily developed a fever and Craig developed a nasty case of "what do we do, what do we do??". Thankfully, calmer (read: more tired) heads prevailed and I decided to just put her to bed and hope things didn't get too much worse.
Today, of course she is a different kid and I feel like an idiot for not getting up and getting her ready for school. No school but of course you can have 7 dozen popsicles , jump rope, eat 15 Hershey's Kisses and then play outside in the snow. Alas, I did not say yes to these very real requests (except for the popsicle part) but I felt like it after two nights of no sleep and innumerable loads of foul smelling laundry. Knock yourself out babe, Mom's having a nap.
Tomorrow Tina comes and saves my sanity! Is is wrong to show up at a 1 p.m. flight with a bottle of Kahlua, a gallon of milk and two straws??